Thursday, October 13, 2011

intentional living

I have been thinking a lot about intentional living as of late.  It seems so easy to just let everything go and let the flow of life suck you in.  I have two babes, obviously, and they are my world.  They also take up a large amount of time.  Time playing, reading, feeding, comforting.  Not that I would trade that in for the world, I am a mama after all, but it is so easy to be defined by those days.

There never seems to be enough time for me to do everything that I want to do, so some things slide.  I either spend the day really engaging my kids, or I spend the day really cleaning the house.  Or I spend the day on the internet, trying to figure out how to engage my kids and clean my house...all in the same day :-)  I don't want to completely lose myself, and sometimes that day to day balance gets to me.  I think about what it means to step back and live, not just float along as the days come and go.

After talking to Matt about goals, we implemented some changes to our routine.  It wasn't easy since he works two jobs...but we have come up with a few changes that have been working in our weekly rhythm.

The first is to allow us each a couple hours each week to be alone.  It isn't a huge amount of time, and I am sure that there are families out there that spend a lot more time apart from their family as a whole.  We tend to be a family that spends very little solitary time.  Not that I think that is bad either, but I needed a couple hours to just sit in silence while Matt played with the kids, and he needed a couple hours to listen to random podcasts about God knows what (Doctor Who).

It has really been wonderful, and interesting.  The first two weeks I didn't know what to do, so I sat in my craft room drinking a glass of wine.  And that was it.  Really.  For two hours.  I was so overwhelmed with *stuff* that I didn't know what to do when I had time alone to do something fun and for myself.  Now I am still drinking the wine, but I'm also knitting and reading and watching random tv shows that my sister-in-law sends my way (totally awesome by the way).

The second change we have implemented is to not make plans for all.  We have declared it family day.  With Matt working 6 days per week, it was something that was necessary.  We don't always do something fun like Unplugged Sunday.  Sometimes Matt has to work part of the day.  Sometimes we do make last minute plans with our friends, but for the most part we don't.

I can't even explain how great that has been for our family dynamic.  It obviously is difficult, we have a lot of family that we want to see, but overall it seems to be better for us as a household to really hold Saturdays as a free day just for us.  It is also allowing us to get a lot of much needed work around the house done.  All the extra stuff that really doesn't get done during the week (see first paragraph), like outside chores, fixing up our house, that kind of thing.

These are just two of the changes that we are attempting.  I think that overall everything has worked out really well so far.  We have a whole list of changes that we want to make, but taking it slow has been key for us.  These two changes alone have made a world of difference though.

What about you?  Do you try to live intentionally?  Or are you swept away by the day to day?  Any tips for former floaters?


  1. It's all such a process, isn't it? I think your changes are great ones. We're trying to have "date nights" at least on Friday or Saturday nights - even if it's just shutting off the tv and talking, watching a movie or making a special dinner together we can enjoy....alone. And, I find if I keep up with everything during the week (laundry, dishes, etc) I don't feel as stressed on the weekends and can ***try*** to relax and enjoy. I also take one night a week "to work" on blogging, crafting or whatever - I'm trying to figure it out and certainly have a long, long way to go. Maybe someday?

  2. Sounds GREAT! I too can get what you mean. I used to be so much better at intentional living, at green living, at non-toxic living, etc etc but I've come to realize that I have to accept and embrace where I am now. In reality I LOVE my jobs. I definitely wish there was more time to get done all the things that I want to do, but the irony is that I too have a hard time adjusting back into "slowness" (although I love it!). The glass of wine and just sitting and breathing and embracing life sounds great. I love that y'all are taking the time to support each other in the solitude in order to keep on giving as well as you do. And honestly I don't think that non-committed Saturday is selfish or anything at all. You have to take care of you and if you only get one day together--then you four need to embrace it! :)


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