Revisiting the Skill of Slow Living: A Guide
The Skill of Slow Living is something that I wrote about way back in 2017, however, recently I have wanted to revisit this topic. Why is it a skill and not something you can easily fall into? Slow living is something that takes an enormous amount of work. It is completely counter-cultural. It isn’t something you easily fall into, it takes active decision making. That makes slow living hard, and our brains don’t want to do the hard things. But, it is important, so let’s revisit.
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What is interesting to me is that I see the same kind of stress and anxiety out in the world today as I did back in 2017, as I did back in 2010. It seems like these feelings cycle. We start to make good on the promises to ourselves – do what matters, get rid of the extra and unnecessary, set good goals. But, then, all of a sudden, 7-10 years go by and you start to re-evaluate. You have some of the same struggles, but the old systems are no longer working. The changes you made don’t make the same amount of difference as they used to. Or, you have fallen back into the comfort of not having to actively make decisions constantly.
I still want the same things that I did in 2017, but how I approach getting there needs to be tweaked a bit. So this month we are going to be revisiting the skill of slow living. I want us to dig deep to figure out what matters to us. We all want to make progress on our goals, we all want to make sure that we are doing what is best for our families, for our homeschools, and for ourselves. And taking a different path isn’t bad, it just means that we need to follow a different map.
Come over and join my membership community where we will be digging deeper into the skill of slow living with challenges and extra support for you!
What is the Skill of Slow Living?
Before we figure out the how, we need to understand the what. So what exactly is the skill of slow living? To me, the skill of slow living is stepping off the hamster wheel. It is getting back to basics and not feeling all the pressure of society to mold yourself, or your family, or your homeschool into a specific thing. It is counter-cultural. Taking your time with life, stepping off the beaten path, and making your way on an unconventional trail.
You may wait to get your kids cell phones, you’re not on social media constantly, or you create “office hours” when you are available to check text messages and dm’s. When you do this, you automatically get put into an “other” category. When you decide to opt-out of sports because they practice and have games on Sunday mornings, and you protect that time for your family, you get put into an “other” category. Instead of following the crowd, you make decisions that are just a little bit different.
It doesn’t mean that the decisions other people are making are bad, they’re just not for you. We all want to make the right choices for our families, and each family is different. Each season is different. The purpose of this is to realize we don’t have to follow the crowd, we can deviate from the well-beaten path. And my examples of “off the beaten path” do not need to be yours – remember, this is family specific!
So, what is the skill of slow living? It is actively making decisions to live the life you want to outside the fast lane. It is not rushing through the current thing so you can get to the next thing. You are taking your time to review and reflect and celebrate your small wins before you jump into something new. Most importantly, it is giving you space to breathe so you don’t feel rushed and overwhelmed constantly.
Why Revisit the Skill of Slow Living?
Have you heard the old adage “the more things change, the more they stay the same?” What this means is that no matter how much things change – your seasons or different chapters of your life, the age of your kids, new technologies, shifting family dynamics – the challenges still stay the same. You are still trying to find balance in a chaotic world. I am still trying to find balance.
No matter how much the external circumstances change, you still need rest. You still need connection and intentionality. Slow living is still relevant because it meets that unchanging desire for peace and connection in your life. You want that mindfulness guiding you towards a life you love. A life of meaning and purpose, fulfilling your goals, and growing your relationships.
Since I wrote that original post back in 2017, it seems like so much has changed. What has stayed the same though is my desire to live intentionally. I still want to enjoy every bit of every day. I don’t want to waste time on the things that don’t matter to me or my family. And it seems as though there is so much more vying for our attention than even just 8 years ago.
With Experience comes Clarity
When I originally started thinking about slow living I tied it to the concept of slow food that I was so enamored with around 2005-2010. I am still enamored by slow food, in case you were wondering. I have learned so much over the years about where our food comes from, and how to grow and source local food. But, it takes effort. And slow living in general takes a lot of effort.
One of the lessons I have learned over the years of my slow living journey is how to create boundaries. You can set boundaries too. It is hard, because the external expectation is always still there, but for peace of mind, boundaries are important.
We will be exploring slow living over the next couple of months in my membership community, and I would love to see you there as we dream and plan for our intentional lives.
What kinds of boundaries do I like to keep? I like my rhythms and routines. Committing to not doing things at particular points in the year is helpful. The ability to see the shiny new thing and say no. Social media breaks and office hours, like I said above, completely counter-cultural, but so very important for me to keep the sense of overwhelm down. And finally, revisiting my yes and no list regularly. This one little step in my goal setting has had enormous benefits personally and professionally. I can’t do everything for everyone, and I can’t be responsible for someone else’s happiness – that is on them. But, I can protect my own peace by sticking to my decisions as I move forward, and you can do the same.
Let’s Chat about the How
Each person’s slow living journey is going to be their own. I can’t give a one-size-fits-all approach to slow living. What is slow to me may be fast to you, and that is 100% OK. The purpose of slow living is not necessarily to be completely still (although there are seasons where this is needed), instead slow living is intentional. What makes it slow? The time you put into the decisions and goals that guide your life.
Over the next several weeks we will be talking about some different areas of life where slow living can come into practice, but the how is going to be up to you. I can give you ideas, but the decisions you make have to be your own. That is the biggest part of the how. You need to understand your why behind your decisions. There are no wrong answers, by the way. As long as it is your why, it is important to you, and that matters.
Perhaps slow living isn’t the best phrase. It is my phrase because I tied it to the slow food movement. But, perhaps a better phrase would be intentional living. You are making the choices to live an intentional life. You are actively making decisions to follow your own path. When you take the time to look at what your goals are, what you want for yourself and your family, you start to slow down. It is inevitable because you have stepped off the normal path. The normal path is a strong current that drags you along. But, your path is unique to you and your family.
Remember slow living isn’t about doing less, it is about doing what matters most to you with joy.
What is one intentional choice you are making today to live a life you love? I would love for you to come over and share that in my membership community and join with us as we explore slow living and goal setting over the next couple of months!
